Wednesday, December 28, 2005 @Wednesday, December 28, 2005
On jan 3 wat am i goin to show
i dunno
Standin in front of all wat am i goin to say
i dunno
wen my minds all floatin w things dat aint grasped
wen i haven even an idea of how it is
Help me
I hate final yr proj.
It has caused me so much anxiety
ripped me so much tm
No one understands
N wen im misunderstood
above all d stress i am undergoing on myself
I reli wished u all understood
I reli wished to fall back into u guys jus hav a good laugh out nite
Its not dat away from u im not worried bout how u r
Everyone falls
Wen i fell i was alone too
where were u den
So dun judge too soon
dun push away too soon
But sad
i cant change the way ppl judge
if u see it, beneath the long years we had
i cant do anything
? and i stand in the
wonder of your love
@Wednesday, December 28, 2005
251205
Merry xmas.
If its anything tat keeps one bond, its love.
Swensens wif joel jas n den my VIP :)
A good end to the day.
? and i stand in the
wonder of your love
@Wednesday, December 28, 2005
231205
You said i would wake up to a new day
happy n smiling
But i woke up
with tears streamin down my eyes
You call it my nitemare
No one can gif it names, coz only i know
For sth tat i hav long cast it as nth,
For the things u didn see, for the things i did u didn see
The girl freed the pigeons.
I cant find a way to ur hrt
Explains got lost wen u hav long set ur own mind of thoughts
Ripped of my innocence slashed wif a black banner over me
Like how i grew up n dey accused me of things i nv did n i had to swallow it down
I hated it.
But now , its heart break
dat its u.
Why can't feelings speak for itself
for my mouth failed to speak
Who will ever know
My deep feelings, d love, d all
Wen u dun know.
N its a heart break
U turned ur boat n drift away
Its a cold xmas
A tm of givin
I was given away.
? and i stand in the
wonder of your love
Monday, December 19, 2005 @Monday, December 19, 2005
Sometimes life gets to a point
u feel like no words no point no air
nothing.
My life started out shit i noe not how to better express it den tis word
Nobody knows how hard I try
Squeezing optimism thru the slighest crack i could find for breadth
But world crushed me
Swept me thru betrayal, prejudice, injustice n pain
What i promised myself nv came
Tom never once got better.
Tat moment.
Suddenly
i lost all my feelings.
I can't see how i was seen
I can't breathe the things dat tore my head
Back turned, i saw
How can it be, i was left
It killed me to think bout
I was standing on the edge of the utmost top
den i fell.
I cant quite say how i feel..
i dunno how to.
Its deep
n i dunno how long it'l heal
Every day goes on
Love, i pray.
Keep me going.
? and i stand in the
wonder of your love
Saturday, December 17, 2005 @Saturday, December 17, 2005
Sat nite.
I am home
Doing my work
Trying to.
I feel, tho i wished i couldn feel.
The pressure bursts all direction
Stuffed n no air
N who would understand the feelin?
Wat world
dat we gotta do, n we see no beginning no end
wen we're at the end, its where we finally see, i guess.
I am not strong as i put on my outer self.
I wanna collapse.
? and i stand in the
wonder of your love
Friday, December 02, 2005 @Friday, December 02, 2005
How can tis be?
still find it hard to believe somehow
Not very very close, but still some tinge of pity
Out of all, he will come forth to chat
A nice chap, easy going n friendly
What made this young air force guy jump?
What was he going through dat he saw no more hope, no more meaning
Dat death seems the only comfort he could get, or at least to stop d pain
How helpless he must have been, how dark
Life sometimes wears one out.
It crunches, that tis could have been avoided
Did u actually didn mean it to push him so far
Did u didnt see dat wat u wan wat u tink is small but could be too much to take for someone else
Did u always think tom would always wait for u
Did u ever thought ur stubborness would somehow leave no mark for tom
Have u ever thought ur 'ill c u another time' will leave u never able to c him again
U nv saw darkness b4, growin up with all d love,comfort n all goods
U tot u had all d time
I wonder now wat time means to u at dis very moment
How slow does one day pass by?
But now u see how bad u wished, n how hard it is to go back jus one day
Do u now see some lost u can never replay
U go on regret whole life
U see things n u think ur own way, in d small picture
Now only tis made u let u see it in d big picture
How many regrets, how much hurt r u feelin?
Why didnt u just stepped a step bac, y didn u tink for other
Will tis be a wake up call for u my cousin i noe ull see things more differently from now
Everyone is sad a good person was lost,only 23 or 24 yrs old?
U will be sad for u lost someone who loved u dearly.
U saw urself all d tm, u failed to see how he always try to love u better.
Ive seen deaths
Time, we r at its mercy.
Don't presume, don't assure, u always have tomorrow.
Nothing is certain
I grasp onto all d time i have.
Special time with special one.
? and i stand in the
wonder of your love
@Friday, December 02, 2005
21st Bday
It is said more of a thing den it is.
Wen it comes, it is not more den jus another day.
Some came, some nv showed.
And so u see, how life has reached
n u see some, the times have forgotten
now it becomes nth.
Mayb its forgottenWhy do i still wishedI should have let it floated away with the windSo i won feel tis disappointmentSo i could lift my head upi must see its only me leftBut d fact is fixed
n i m only thankful for wat i have now
The special one for being dere
despite u had to go away at tms
At least for d tm u could.
Ur presence, makes all d difference.
The first cake may be in d middle of d roadside,
n we couldn find fire for d candle
But it was enough, more den enough.
For d fire d joy in my heart was more den a blaze, burning fiery.
Do u noe how much i thank god, for u.
For ure my greatest gift, i eva received in my life.
Silly, got lost! how can? lol
See u made my bday so fun..haha
The comfort of seeing old friends, how many its ok
sometimes numbers do not matter dat much.
Glad my buddies were dere.
Thank u, u all.
3 days 2 nites
extended wif a whole lot of macdonalds brkfast hee.
Best meal was at nite.
Simple meal, of satay by d beach :)
Happy little girl she was..
? and i stand in the
wonder of your love
