Tuesday, January 22, 2008 @Tuesday, January 22, 2008
The moon was so round n huge tonite
when i wen out for my run by e river
Nice.
But too beautiful can make one feel down as well
How ironic
Somewhere, out there
Somewhere out there.
Am leaving for e hol already
Hopefully it gets me off all else
Take away my aches n weariness.
? and i stand in the
wonder of your love
Saturday, January 19, 2008 @Saturday, January 19, 2008
Jerene got married
Happy for her :)
My turn next.. hur
when man
But will be nice
Anyways met up with all e cousins
Irritating got bombarded by so many "Finally see u huh"s
Busy with wat
Of cos is work la doo.
N all was all hoo ha abt my red hair
Damned mayb i should hav dyed my hair after e dinner
Den y nobody noticed when i had black hair for so so so long?
heh o wells
Dinner was alrite,crazy
Except e part e waitress (auntie) called me "xiao di"
Den my cousin wen.."aunti she is not xiao di"
Den waitress said.."Is shuai ge"
Den everyone laughed
When cousin told aunty i am femme
Aunti presented more ginko nuts for my yam paste as an apology
Haha aiya im used to it
At least now i don bother to hide
i dont run away
I dont fuckin care anything
lol
But...feel quite lousy
When i hear others talkin bout their jobs
Its not that mine is nuts
But i just suddenly feel unfair
Not unfair that i should get wat others get
But unfair to myself
For e work tat i put in n have been pushing so hard
N nobody can ever understand how much as in how much time i spend working
N all e shit we get
Tink im reli tired of all
But jovin,
i keep telling myself
I am thankful as well
I am learning alot
Tis is my platform, tat someday it acts as a steppin stone
To get somewhere far
Mayb someday to even fly (even if is close to impossible)
I donno if i will collapse before i get anywhere
Four colleagues leaving
It is gettin so bad these days
tat nobody can take it any longer
N it only gets worse with pple leaving
But maturity has set in me i guess
None of e jobs i held can compare to tis
N i noe out there i will neva find another almost as tough as tis one(i won say none at all)
But i just wan to work hard
I don mind
I want to work hard
For e future
For all e people who will be with me in e future
I want to provide
I want to give happiness
Although now i look
n ahead of me lies more gloom den clarity
N i aint sure if ahead it will all lead me nowhere
But i am gonna persevere.
Now i tink i need to get away
Get away from everything
Re charge
Re vitalise
N not tink of anything
Four more days to e trip
:)
? and i stand in the
wonder of your love
Monday, January 14, 2008 @Monday, January 14, 2008
I had a bad day
E other nite dear
it seems i had a bad nightmare
I was struck
i was overcomed by wear by tear
And sadness fills me up
Why do i always come back to here, and fall
? and i stand in the
wonder of your love
Thursday, January 10, 2008 @Thursday, January 10, 2008
I wished i could scream.....................................
Urghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
i wished.
Nevermind
e hol trip is almost here.
Come quick i needa break
////e place stings my eyes so much i wished i could take them out be blinded////
? and i stand in the
wonder of your love
Tuesday, January 08, 2008 @Tuesday, January 08, 2008
Wen out for my run
Suddenly it started pouring
N man was the rain so tremendous heavy!
But secretly i was enjoying it
The rain scent, the freshin feel,
Almost makes one feel one's weary soul all washed away
down wif e rain
But alrite
I know..
a day or 2 later ill be feeling ill again
since already weak
I am cold as ice
Who then have warmth
////wanna melt me......?////
? and i stand in the
wonder of your love
Saturday, January 05, 2008 @Saturday, January 05, 2008
Met Jay n all
Jay with a sprained ankle n her sexy voice
Stop partying so hard
Bad for health man
Ended up at Play
Some dancing com goin on
Whistles tat almost blew my ear off
Li was reli tickling us wif her "Cant take Long Island"
But me n Kenken were having fun orderin tat, how mean heh
But we 3 bungs did have fun, funny ok don ask how, or wat we did
Bet its just a break away from e weary life out dere
Anyways
Congrats to gayboy not havin to bake turkeys n more turkeys anymore
Console to Li who will be havin no offs till new yr
N i guess console to myself as well for having to continue to work my arse off
By the time we were of a reasonably high,
we wen dancefloor...dance a litt..shake a litt mayb
But it was wierd..house music.. Rnb wld hav helped
So we gave up after a while
We still stayed till close
Had supper with Beewee n rest
At least a nite out...
Perhaps chilling would been a betta idea
Back to work again with hardly few hrs in between shifts
Hai
n i wonder y i even agreed to go back work on my mon off
when i am feelin unwell yet again
Mayb caught a cold n too tired
Why i still just go on workin
Nvm...don worry ill be fine...
God, mayb u'd give me directions tell me wat to do...
? and i stand in the
wonder of your love
Wednesday, January 02, 2008 @Wednesday, January 02, 2008
2007.
Reflections.
Lookin back..
A long whirl a journey thus far
Where should i even begin
Tis year i trodded past sand, dust, clives, skies, edges
Edges tat cut
Been thru turmoils
Tat i fell, tat i lost myself
It had been a tough yr
N ppl are sayin 2008 is a bad year for rats
How can it be, how to survive
But there isnt a choice, just a path
The dream
The dream held for such a long tm
e one in ur heart u always kept
e one u believed
N when nothing bleams in tis world n u are worn out
e dream u believed
tat gives u strenth, gives u courage to go on
Yet wen e dream seems near, u feel furthest from it
U ask, was it real
Perhaps it was never ever close
But, e dream left u
Without a thought without a feel without a anything
All tat u held it snatches away
All tat u believed it left u shattered
For all of e effort i put in
It sees none
How could ...?
Striving so much for
Fightin so hard for
Do u noe how much it breaks me
Do u noe how bad i fell
Perhaps ppl are laughin at me
Tat small i am, such high dreams i wished for
And so many factors
tat i could never ever make it.
Even if i put in how much,
I might not reach.
Guess ive been, tell me, am i a fool
Lost n down
wat directions
n tell me wat else could i believe in
Trying so hard
Mayb trying too hard
There won't ever be amount to anything
when the dream no longer holds
Becoz i held it in such a high place
e more painful i fell
But it should stop raining
e dream has already since not be here
Ive done my part
ive gave all i could give
I...i cant control the rest
Why..still ask myself sometimes
but now i figured let it,e way it wants to flow..
For people wise
Its not like i havent been thru rain
Ive been thru storms
I just pray...
For strength to go on
when pple try to break me
May i continue walkin my life
N e day come soon
when i will be able, to stand on my own
n the sun shinning down on me
I pray tat the trials, the edges tat cut..
one day mould me to be stronger
E one thing i lost much tis yr
is my health
For all e workin sometimes im not human
im but a machine
I know i should take care of health coz nth can buy it back
yet i neglect it so much
N its taking a toll on me tis year
I ought to be shot
Thank u
I must say to one person
u stayed there for me
When i was at my lowest times
U stayed with me
When nobody else did
Mayb nobody else cares for me,
except u
Im sorry when i wasn't the best for u
I am not perfect, not even close
But i will try
Every step of e way ahead
2008.
? and i stand in the
wonder of your love
