Monday, August 01, 2005 @Monday, August 01, 2005
Today feels a little heavy
I wen up to Villa Francis Home for the aged
d one i wen up for volunteer services wen i was in cj
I rem 2 sisters i met
D elder one was v friendly,spoke to me in gd english
She told me stories, told me her life
n intro-ed me to her younger sis, her next bed partner
Altho being d elder sis, she cleans up, takes care, feeds her younger sis
who was blind in one eye n was reli ill.
I saw how she did all of these, w so much love for her sis.
I was moved den.
My photojournalism class, i wanted to do a story on dem w pics.
I cldn rem how to go dat place
I cldn contact dem by fone
I cldn rem deir names
But i still wen.
I got permission from d catholic 'brother' dere.
He said as long as dey r ok wif it, den go ahead.
we managed to find tat pair of sisters.
I didn recognise her d 1st tm i made rounds into d rooms
bcos she cut her hair alr.
She cldn reg me, which i alr expected.
i gav a brief intro.
Like 3 yrs bac, she held my hand tight
n talked.
All d tm, she held on to her rosary.
But tis time, she talked quite wierdly
N when she said, " deres somebody inside my body n torturing me."
i knew she wasn't ok lk 3 yrs bac.
Time has taken away her health, her mind, n sense.
Once a old lady full of drive, n mind so clear
Now shes down to one weak, and senile
1 nurse came in n clarified dat w me.
I do not share blood w Lucy.
I am neither a kin nor her anyone.
But, i felt d ache in me.
I sat dere quiet lookin at her
nv spoke for words all left me.
I spoke a little to her younger sis
In btws dere were communication brk dwn
I dunno if she noes wat im talkin
N im sure i cldn catch all of wat shes tokin.
I dunno y..
But y does it seem dat i find d younger sis in a betta shape den d elder now
which was so different frm dat tm
But we all noe both r nt well
No more d strong elder sis takin care of d younger ill sister
Younger sis lying on d bed
Elder sis sitting by her own n mummbling to herself
D saddest thing is when i asked Lucy to go close to thresea to tk a pic
she was reluctant, she rather tk alone
dere was tis empty space btw dis sisters.
No more d unseparable pair
Jus bcos of d monster of tm, n health.
I wonder, r dey den strangers as every day pass?
Wat wld become of d younger sis now dat her elder sis can't tc of herself alr..
Who else can each one of dem depend on?
But who can blame
Every day sitting starin into space
dere is nth to do
dere is no one
dere is nth to look forward to
how does one's mind not lose itself?
Torture indeed.
My story is a failure
Tis proj is undone.
But most importantly, i left wif a sigh
My heart goes out to all of d old people dere
Every face i saw, every suffering.
Suddenly d place feels so cold
N i cldn bear to stay on a min more
to see d sufferings.
See how time rips off
n robs one of everything.
Life is short.
Live it d way u wan
Don be afraid to live it d real way u wan
Live, n leave no regrets
Don live for everyone else but not urself.
Don wait till time ticks away..
*sigh
