I actually burst in office

I don know, don know bout anything

Why, what, how

Its coming 5am

I still cant sleep

I forgot this is the number wat day.

Kills.

? and i stand in the
wonder of your love

2 incidents
On me, tat i have to bear

Tat i had to be shot at.

The addiction of thrill
tat keeps me thinking n thinking
awake or waiting to sleep
Has become tis heavy dark clouds tat weighs on me

How careful u must be
How quick n quick witted u must be
How every shift seems like a war
Fighting got my heart n passion on fire
Now afraid im burnt
To ash.

Wat lit my fire
now seems to be nil but a whole load of stress i tuck in my heart my mind my soul
It is drilling me apart

All e stress i am goin thru
I am biting my nails till it bleeds

...All i merely wanted
was to tell u...

Den i realised
I am, but alone.

never there.

? and i stand in the
wonder of your love

I can't get to sleep tis nite
Suddenly had a gush of feel
N jus thought ill come in here to write

Den i realised
Wow, its been a long tm since i came here

Tis nite
It feels kinda blue.. kinda heavy..
Perhaps my evening hasnt been too well

And here i am
Trying to seek comfort, but lost
And here i am
Trying to find inner peace with myself,
but no so

Tis head
heavy with thoughts
heavy with worries
heavy with whats

I am tryin..
I feel sad that im not felt tat way

How better could i be?

Perhaps its just my fault..
for being not good enough.

....

And i gazed far
its a killer to think
wats in dat bleak future for me

When u wish u could know e next step
when u wished u had a clue

when u wished u could achieve more
but i see myself here n nothing
i hang my head
n sob.

I am workin hard
does anyone know

I wished i had somewhere i could lay
i wished i had support

Thinkin of nex week
Having to go thru e ..
I already wished i could escape


Not e rock songs tonite
Perhaps tis soft music
hopefully i am able to put all aside
n go to sleep..


Flightless Bird, American Mouth - Iron & Wine

? and i stand in the
wonder of your love

Just attended a wake

At e age of 23, life should be just begun
But it spelt e end for her

It wasnt even a common illness
N nobody will know how n why

3 months ago she was fine
3 months later she is forever gone

I regret
not knowin earlier
I should at least made a visit
Many years since e last tm i saw her
now only bits n pieces of memory of her remain
for everyone

Why God
did u create life for her
only to take it away sooner den it should be

Can see how vulnerable life is

U never noe wat comes
or when ull fall

U never noe e next moment
So live today.

Anna, have a good journey.

? and i stand in the
wonder of your love

Knockin on Heavens Door - Guns N Roses

2008...
Transiting to 2009

Reports show makin new year resolutions could be bad
bcoz ppl might end up feelin worse if it fails
But.. reckon i'd still do a look back

2008
Like past year
hasn't been good

A train of emotions
A hike of ups n downs, mostly downs

Some things..
reli crush me
Some wounds..
tat forever would hurt

Wat i went through
don't even try to understand

How i felt
Is like excruciating pain
tat killed my soul

My heart was broken, really believe me.
If one day u were to read back n see tis.


But, i chose to forgive

In everything, embrace it with love
and nothing can make u change
Nothing can make u give up


Some skies..
tat never could be reached

Some place in time..
i never could get there

If wishes could be felt
I wish u felt my wishes


Some work..
makes u crap makes u worn out

But do it with positive vibe
Passion is the ultimate key to keep one going.

Forget all e tears, all e sadness in 2008
let a new year begin
Be thankful for e things u still have
Job tat still ensures a stable income,
People who are still there,
Life tat u still breathes.

I wish ,
Less natural disasters to snatch ppl's lives,
Scrappin of wars to claim innocent lives,
Greater unity to tide over e recession period,

I wish to all,
more smiles,
more positiveness,
more happiness,
and greatest of all,
love.

? and i stand in the
wonder of your love

Festive season seems more tiring
But its always better to be busy den not..
Busy and ure happy, it makes ur day.

Dinner with e guys at MOF
Lotsa Banga out man!
Protect yourselves n ur girls! lol

I'm glad we caught e fireworks..
:)

I donno e magical moment...
I think when one's eye sees beautiful things,
one's heart naturally feels good

So,
don't always look at e obvious ugly
Look at inner beauty
Look at the beautiful

Learn to appreciate
I always believe in tat.

After tat,
Ktv till 6am
wow...play hard!
Its new year day
If not now, then when

But now its recovery time
Am so sick, gotta rest
In between my 7 days straight work
*sulks
So, today tis fake off,
which means reachin home 3 am last nite n workin midnite tonite,
i have to rest at least a bit

My insomnia las nite was bad
Tis morn papers reads...
Insomnia is caused by 3 things
Stress, Anxiety or depression
Which is mine?
lol i also donno.
I just wanna put myself at ease too ,
to fall asleep too.

//And den CNY is next...
//Have a fat n bountiful CNY!!!


Nickelback - Hero (acoustic) - Nickelback

? and i stand in the
wonder of your love

Santa claus, choir carolings, candies n treats, candysticks, jingles, dazzling lights
n orchard road...
Mayb those are e cream of xmas.

The core of the heart , i feel e real meaning of xmas,
warmth.

Tis year, there were warm moments.

The smile, the long awaited smile...
None other greater warmth, nor happier thing.
:) smile.

Tis week was shiok
2 off days, 2 AL
So total i worked only 3 days..
Every week should be like tat!!
Haha
But den ill feed on bread so better not!

Of all e days,
I tink i enjoyed most e day after xmas
I guess i like e warm feelin of a "home"
Which most probably is ive never had one
My home is HELL.

Simple gathering, simple things we do
Good meal too! haha
Den hurry to catch a movie

Now,
I must go run tonite
I haven exercised for 2 weeks tis is bad
N xmas i ate so so much!! haha
Alright festive im forgiven
But now mus jiayou jiayou

Lastly......
some wishes
After so long,
May Happiness be with me
n to everyone else...

Merry christmas.

? and i stand in the
wonder of your love

Vomited after reachin office
Not feelin too well
Actually..
but i tried to pull it off

In hope of a good day.

Everybody has alot to hold
Its only some show some don

In hope of smiles
In hope of a simple day feelin close

But e clouds clog e sky
one day...after another...n another
Till i hung my head down

For i lost myself in thoughts
I dont know if its my fault
I dont know wat i should do
I dont know when e sky will sing

I feel, an ache my heart
A hole
It killed me

So many days
I could let it pass

Tis day meant alot to me
Why.
Why couldnt at least be

Wat is my scope
Jus wat must i do..

? and i stand in the
wonder of your love

Wow...
Suddenly started to rain
N its like so heavy

I could smell e scent of e rain
I could almost feel
And it gives a rather pleasant feel to e nite

Its pretty ecentric
How one's feelings towards e rain varies with one's mood
A person in good mood tend to feel e rain pretty nice
A sad person on e other hand feels worse with e rain

Past weeks i have been feelin down
reli down

Feelin better already

One bad thing though
I am startin to eat alot again
Meanin im so gonna gain back all e weight i lost
:(
I hope i can have all e time for a run every day
Music keeps me goin
And guess it relieves some of e ills suppressed in me....

I guess...
In everything tat u do
Wat reli matters is how much u feel
And how much do u hold of that
At e end of e day,
E rest becomes just small details tat wont matter
and change tat feel.

Lookin elsewhere
there is quite alot to look forward to
Xmas is coming.... :)
Now just awaiting for e papers to finish :D

? and i stand in the
wonder of your love

14Nov
-Li Chun Ni-
At e concert, Yuming did suddenly pause
and den spoke in between choking words
about his friend, tis ger e world lost






Xing Guang 3
She is e voice i tot well of
E kinda tat had a nice low


Those who normally laugh on e outside
Are those who are really sad inside
They are e ones who always try to make others happy
But keeping all e sorrow to themselves

"重感情"...
Not everyone can understand that.
First to come into people's minds would be
Why take feelings so seriously
Why let it be everthing to u
People might be scolding why take this way out
But no one soul who is not feeling tis way
could ever understand
What she was going through
There must have been a lot of hurt, a lot of sadness, a lot of pain..
She felt.
How much something means to a person
sometimes can't be said with words

When one holds so much inside
And reaches e edge
E other end is but a line away
Just how much could one take afterall
But don ever forget how much courage it takes
to decide on tis

There shouldn't be any judging
There shouldn't be any thing said
Any thing could well have be done before this

A simple word or act or thought
might have changed her mind
But ... until its too late

Well,
at least she have a dad and sister who care

What ifs...

If u had a chance to go back in time,
wat would u change

Would u have done something differently
Would u have forgave
Would u have loved

Its sad tat i understand

////If God made tis world to be so much sorrow and pain,
Why did he brought us here in e first place...////

? and i stand in the
wonder of your love

28 10 2008

? and i stand in the
wonder of your love

Workin from 2pm to next mornin 10am
again
Its crazy. Im not human, i am but a robot.
I tried to get more sleep las nite
But managed to catch 5 hrs only
Bad..

Another comrade lost
A friend resigned
Those who should leave nv leave
those could have enlightened atmosphere shouldn left
left.
Couldn take it
n left
E people e stress e pressures.

I need a trip away.
+Feeling so small in tis vast world+
+Exhaustion and weariness tides in...+

? and i stand in the
wonder of your love

I was reli feelin terrible

My weariness
My depress
And a mere hope of comfort at e sight
Thinkin of glad thoughts
Of puttin my heart to e slightest solace

Setting my clock earlier
May e hours bring me closer, sooner

Must it be?

E greatest solace i could get
I only hear sobs
Of tat broken.

Why did e hand tat could hold to heal
was e very one to bow e arrow
tat shot thru n thru

E pain on my hands
A grain of sand compared to tat inside

Everything crushed i was
E nite, too cruel

How bad I was feelin
N who would even twitch an eye
not even one who care

/////////////I breathe all tis pain in silence...//////////////
Do u meant it, can u tell me i am wrong.
I dont wanna be rite.

Tell, me

? and i stand in the
wonder of your love

Fuckin remarks

I am so tired from tis job, these people
Some people some how just know how to take advantage of others
Just know how to be fuckin scheming

I donno why i had to take so much
I hate how i have helped ppl
I have worked overhours over shifts for u fuckin ppl
N yet when i have tis one fucked up split shift
I see how all have HELPED
FUCK u all

All of me tat i always give
Look where it always fuckin get me

U
U could so jolly well help without being much affected
Yet u are so DAMN fucked up
Let me say it again
I fuckin have nth to say ok
I dont wish to argue
Or even start how ive been played out ok
SO FUCKIN keep ur comments to urself
If dont want to help, its ok
I can always take it all myself

I am more man den so many of u
I feel so fucked
I took all ur fucked shifts n hours, i even took warning letter for someone
I beared it all
Wat else man
I can only say i am so fuckin stupid for being so selfless

Been quarreling with u senseless
A colleague i tot would help me out
Forget it man
U r just a kid so childish
at least dont speak ok

And i swear my heart is so hurt

Tis world, kindness only gets u dying
People are fuckin bastards

I am SO FUCKIN' weary
Can someone take me somewhere else..

Rock is e only way
i can channel all these anger, frustrations, hurt, pain, exhaustion...

So blast tat music over n over n over again.

? and i stand in the
wonder of your love

Thanks for coming down to e airport

Thanks for e 3 layer sandwich u made
N a giant HELLO PANDA
u just spoilt my GIANT diet plan :)
But as i ate e sandwich u made, i really was touched.

Thanks for waiting till dawn till i off work
Before i could say how i failed my dieting,
big breakfast was on its way!
Hur.

We combed e 2 giant buildings den.
Tat was e earliest i shopped, for a very long tm
Hur.

It was v tiring,
i tink u also were v tired.
But it reli helped me destressed alot
was reli a comfort
to tis weary heart of mine
Thanks to e effort really.

:)

? and i stand in the
wonder of your love

E good news tats been long awaited!

300 increase
which means alot
in terms of hard work or comfort basis

It was a lucky strike
Not exactly an increase out of company's goodwill
but bcoz they had to match e pay with tat of e changed pay scheme for new applicants

But still,
money cant cover everything

? and i stand in the
wonder of your love

"Your wounds r all very badly infected.."

2nd time to e clinic
Too pain, too ill.


Call...
"So wat time?"
Call...
"Wat time gonna finish?"

Rush...rush...
Ask ... ask...

I already guessed e reason for e rush

Call again..
"If too late or u go bac urself...
...coz JAYNE .... know....

My answer
"GO ...dont need wait for me .."

"How bout ur dinner"
"Im dont wanna eat already"

I just knew it
U were so anxious to fetch e small queen
u cant make her wait

Bcoz my legs couldn bend
I had to sit on e sideways seat
N was so giddy all e way i almost puked

Vibration.. call... vibration

I had to cross tat fuckin overhead bridge
It took me a whole 15 mins or more to do tat

But even if i fuckin had to hav my leg amputed
Or fuckin climb on my hands
I wouldn even call u to help me
(Just like how u never ever fuckin was there for me when i needed u)
In my whole life.

It took me a frigg' almost 3 hours to get home

I was so unwell
And piercing pain came from tat somewhere else

I wasnt a bad kid
You made me one.
I wasnt a feelingless person
You made me one.

I wasnt a silent child
You made me one.

? and i stand in the
wonder of your love

Jovin

I believe in gravity but i don believe in tis world// I see not white n black but mostly greys// Smile like u mean it// Jus a ride go round n round-Life// Only best thing-u fill my little world//


link
link
link
link
link
link
link
link
link
link
link
link



February 2001
December 2003
January 2004
February 2004
March 2004
April 2004
May 2004
June 2004
July 2004
August 2004
September 2004
October 2004
November 2004
December 2004
January 2005
February 2005
March 2005
April 2005
May 2005
June 2005
July 2005
August 2005
October 2005
November 2005
December 2005
January 2006
February 2006
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
February 2007
March 2007
July 2007
August 2007
September 2007
October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
March 2009
April 2009



Inspiration : anne
Layout : jeanette
Fonts : dafont
Image: threadless
Brushes : 100x100